


Cereal Killer

by sagansjagger



Series: Domestic Cavities [2]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Crack, Domestic Bliss, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, Humor, Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug Is So Done, Married Adrien Agreste/Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Married Couple, Married Life, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-27
Updated: 2020-07-27
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:01:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25541752
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sagansjagger/pseuds/sagansjagger
Summary: In Marinette's opinion of all the things her new husband, Adrien, buys online, this is the most horrifying...A massive box of selected sugary cereals.And he's going to eat them all.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Series: Domestic Cavities [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1851151
Comments: 63
Kudos: 140





	Cereal Killer

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Missnoodles](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Missnoodles/gifts), [Rikkapikasnikka](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rikkapikasnikka/gifts).



Of all the weird things Marinette’s new husband had bought, this was definitely the most horrifying.

First were the massive LEGO kits that Adrien left half-finished everywhere. Marinette had wanted to encourage his creative passions, and was fine with the LEGO sets initially. But then she started stepping on the pieces in the middle of the night. And after he’d left a half-completed Death Star resting on the dining room table for weeks, she’d told him to pack them up or lose them.

Second were the weird socks. She’d known since a young age that Adrien’s fashion sense… left something to be desired. Again, Star Wars made an appearance with the bromance C-3PO and R2D2 socks. And he ordered socks online _constantly._ Marinette decided she could live with that, until he paired them with a bathrobe with tacos printed on it.

Third was the metal ostrich planter for his plant children. Marinette loved Adrien’s garden, loved the way he’d bloomed himself in tending to the green and growing things. But the pots he chose were hideous. Marinette shook her head every time she passed them in the living room and kitchen.

But this new item, this huge box of random, sample-sized sugary cereals imported from America… was _terror_ -inducing. 

“Tell me you’re not really going to eat those,” Marinette said as she stood in the dining room, facepalming as Adrien held up a brown box with a stylized vampire on it labeled Count Chocula. 

His beaming grin was too bright, too happy. She felt bad for questioning his judgment until she realized that each tiny box probably contained over fifty grams of sugar. “I’m gonna binge the whole--”

“No!” Marinette said, putting her foot down figuratively and literally. “You absolutely will _not._ You’ll make yourself sick if you do that.”

“But--”

“Adrien,” Marinette said, pinching the bridge of her nose.

Adrien deflated like a balloon. Then he brightened again. “Okay, Marinette. I’ll just eat them for breakfasts.”

“Seriously?” Marinette said, grimacing. “If you eat those in the mornings, you’re gonna be wired.”

“I’m sure it’ll be fine!” Adrien said, smiling from ear to ear.

It was not fine.

While Marinette ate a croissant or a piece of fruit, Adrien ate the cursed cereal. He started with the Frosted Shredded Wheat.

"Look, Marinette!" he said, pulling his shirt up and holding one of the pieces of cereal against his abs. "I'm shredded!"

"Oh, my gosh," Marinette said, facepalming again. "That's terrible. You're terrible."

The jokes didn't stop there. Adrien looked up cereal commercials on YouTube and started imitating them.

He ate Frosted Flakes and said, "They're grrrreat!" ala Tony the Tiger with every. Single. Bite.

He ate Captain Crunch and started talking like a pirate. "Arrr, me first love be the sea-re-al!"

He ate Rice Crispies and joked about snap, crackle, popping his neck. Marinette shuddered at that one.

He even poured milk directly into the boxes, which made Marinette gag at the thought of eating out of wet cardboard.

And just as she'd warned him against, Adrien was wired every morning--"Marinette, look at our plant son! He's growing!"--until about noon, when Adrien crashed. He'd be cranky until dinner, after which he'd eat another cereal box and get wired again until bed.

She hoped the nightmare would end soon.

One night, she had a real nightmare of Hawkmoth winning, and woke up at three am to find an empty space where her husband should have been. She rolled out of bed and donned her blue, silk bathrobe with the floral print.

Marinette found Adrien at the dining room table, sobbing into a "bowl" of cereal containing a vertiable rainbow of marshmallows. "Adrien?" she said, laying a hand on his shoulder. "Are you all right?"

He took another bite. "T-They're called _Lucky Charms,_ Marinette! Isn't that beautiful?"

Marinette went back to bed.

Soon, but not soon enough for Marinette's liking, Adrien ran out of cereal. She expressly forbade him to order another box, insisting he eat croissants with jam for breakfast like a reasonable person. 

So it wasn't until he brought another huge Amazon box in from outside that Marinette began to worry. “Adrien,” she said, already preparing for her blood pressure to go through the roof. She pointed at the box. “What is that?”

“Hmm,” Adrien said, setting the box on the dining room table and retrieving a knife from the kitchen block. “Let’s find out!”

Marinette’s eye twitched as he sliced open the packing tape. He removed bubble packaging and set it aside. Then he lifted a massive, massive bag of Lucky Charm marshmallows out of the box.

Marinette’s jaw dropped. “Adrien,” she said, feeling the beginnings of a tension headache spike in her forehead. “Adrien, _no_.”

Adrien gave her the worst, happiest grin she’d ever seen him make. “Adrien, _yes._ ”

**Author's Note:**

> Are you interested in reading or writing fanfiction? Are you looking for a community of like-minded and supportive people? Then join the [Miraculous Fanworks](https://discord.gg/mlfanworks) Discord server! 
> 
> We are always welcoming new members, and would love to see you. We offer a variety of conversations, from fic discussions to writing support to fanfiction prompts. We even have monthly server-wide events and group writing projects! 
> 
> Come join today!


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